When you’ve kissed a guy you thought you liked at the time, but then you realize it was a mistake. It can be hard to find a way to reveal to him what your genuine feelings really are.
You will be asking yourself “How do I tell a guy I’ve kissed I don’t actually like him?” and wonder how to break it to him without hurting his feelings.
A single kiss can hold multiple meanings for him. He might think you’re fully interested in him, and that you want to be in a relationship.
However, when this couldn’t be further from the truth and you have no intention of making him your boyfriend. This is something he really needs to know, especially if he thinks a relationship is on the cards.
So how do you tell a guy you’ve kissed you don’t like him? Should you just be honest, and tell him outright? Or do you need to be subtle and break it to him gently to avoid hurting his feelings?
How Do You Tell A Guy You Kissed You Don’t Like Him?
You might be feeling regret or even guilt because of the kiss you shared with him. But how do begin to tell him you don’t actually like him?
Revealing that you don’t share his feelings or want a relationship with him can be difficult. You’ve already kissed him which can send a lot of mixed signals regarding your interest.
However, there are many ways to make him realize that you don’t like him. You just need to be honest with your true feelings and not hide the truth from him.
Here’s how to tell a guy you kissed you don’t like him.
1. Keep It Casual
When you want to find a way to tell a guy you’ve kissed you don’t really like him. It’s important to keep things casual and act normal towards him. Be nice, but don’t lead him on.
Also, avoid giving him any reason to think the kiss you shared together meant something special to you. As if it didn’t, and you’re not interested in him. You need to be honest about what your intentions really are and keep your cool.
2. Be Honest And Tell Him The Truth
It’s crucial to be honest with him and tell him the truth if you really don’t like him. Explain to him how you feel, and why you think the kiss might have been a mistake.
You need to respect his feelings and be upfront with him about your own. Don’t hide the truth from him, this will only lead to one-sided love and heartbreak.
3. Tell Him What He Does Mean To You
When you still want to see him as a close friend or someone you feel close to emotionally. Be sure to let him know what he does mean to you.
If you’re not interested in him, or you are not prepared for a romantic relationship. Let him know you still want him to be an important part of your life, but just as friends.
Rejection, while it is heartbreaking can feel a lot better if the person rejecting you is also prepared to explain your genuine values are to them. He might not be boyfriend material, but he can still be an amazing friend.
4. Explain Why It Won’t Work
If he asks, explain to him why you think the relationship between you both would not work out. If you think you’re incompatible, or he’s just not your type. Be honest with him, but be nice.
Keep your words to him simple so that the real message remains clear. If you don’t feel any spark and chemistry between you, he should be the first to know.
5. Tell Him You Want To Be Friends
Telling him “I just want to be friends” might sound like a cliché, but it’s actually really important if you genuinely want to remain good friends with him.
While he may not understand fully why you kissed, or be curious about why you would kiss someone you see as only your friend. It’s important to share this message with him if it’s how you genuinely feel.
The last thing you want is him believing the kiss meant something more. So try to avoid hurting his feelings by making it clear you only see him as a friend.
6. Assign Less Meaning To The Kiss
Try to avoid assigning importance or meaning to the kiss you shared with him. Especially if you’re not interested in him, or it was a mistake.
If you make it seem like the kiss was no big deal and you keep things casual with him. Maybe he will view the kiss you shared together in the same way too?
7. Avoid Talking About Kissing Him
The less you talk about kissing him, the better. If you don’t like him and have no intention of being in a relationship with him. It’s recommended to avoid talking over your past intimate encounters.
If you talk about the kiss or remind him about that time you kissed together. He will think this is you re-signaling your interest for him, or perhaps even trying to make him kiss you again.
Just avoid the topic entirely, and find other things to talk about with him. Unless you want him to believe there is still a chance of a relationship with you.
8. Tell Him It Was Lust, Not Love
When the kiss felt like lust more than love. It’s important to tell him what the facts really are. Maybe he caught you in a weak moment, or for a few seconds, you believed in the possibility of a relationship with him.
However, if desire and lust were the driving force behind the kiss. Then you need to make this message clear to him, but be nice about it.
When it was a spontaneous kiss and nothing more than that. Share your feelings about why you think it really happened. Don’t hide the true meaning or intention behind it.
9. Tell Him You Have Someone Else
If you kissed him, but you’re fully interested in someone else. He needs to know to ensure he doesn’t become heartbroken when he finds out.
Make it clear to him that your interest or focus is on somebody else. But be gentle with your words, and try your best to let him down gently.
Don’t make him jealous, or make it seem like the other guy is a better catch. Just be kind with your words, and tell him you feel more compatible and a better match for somebody else.
More Ways To Tell A Guy You’ve Kissed You’re Not Interested
What are some other ways you can tell a guy you’ve kissed you’re not interested?
Finding a way to tell him openly and honestly that you don’t like him can sometimes feel like a real struggle. The kiss might have meant a lot to him, but it’s important to be honest about your genuine feelings.
Here are some more ways to tell a guy you’ve kissed you’re not interested in him.
1. Tell Him The Truth Over Text
Be honest with your words, and tell him the truth over text. He deserves to know all the facts about how you feel, even if you aren’t together right now.
Send him a text explaining what you felt about the kiss, and why you don’t believe it will work out between you. Be gentle and polite, but tell the truth.
2. Ask To Hang Out As Friends
When you still love being in his company, but your not interested in him romantically. Ask him to hang out, but only as friends.
When he can see you treat him just like your other friends, and you send him no signals for wanting a relationship. He might start to get the message, and know you only see him as a friend despite the kiss.
3. Tell Him You’re Not Ready
If you genuinely don’t feel ready to be in a relationship with anyone, or you are fully enjoying being single. Let him know, and explain why you’re not looking for a relationship right now.
Don’t lie to him about not being ready or make excuses. He needs to know the truth about what it is that you want right now.
4. Don’t Lead Him On
Don’t lead him on if you have no intention of being in a relationship with him. If you don’t like him or you hold no interest in being with him. It’s important this is clear from the start.
Leading him on and playing with his emotions will only ever show you don’t respect his feelings. Try to avoid doing this or he could become severely heartbroken later.
5. Tell Him You Don’t Share His Feelings
If he says he loves you or that he cares for you more than a friend. If you don’t share these feelings it’s crucial that you tell him early on.
To avoid him thinking you mirror his intentions and desire to be together. You need to ensure you are clear about your feelings and don’t hide what you really think about him.
6. Take A Break From Him
Sometimes the best way for you to tell someone you’ve kissed that you’re no longer interested is to take a break. It’s not about avoiding him but instead finding some healthy space apart.
When he feels like you’re no longer approachable, or he can’t get ahold of you. He may realize you’re not actually interested in him and moves on.
While it is a severe approach to take, and can still lead to hurt feelings. It can sometimes be the only option available to you depending on the situation and the circumstances.
Signs You Should Tell Him You Don’t Like Him
What are the signs it’s time to tell him you don’t really like him?
Sometimes he begins to take things a little too far and starts to believe you have feelings for him when you don’t. Telling him the truth can be hard, but it’s important that he knows.
Here are the signs you should tell him you don’t like him, even though you might have kissed and have shown some interest in the past.
1. He’s Obsessed With You
When he’s obsessed with you and does everything in his power to get your attention. Such as texting, calling, and even inviting himself to hang out with you.
It’s a solid sign you need to put a stop to it. Especially when your not interested in him and you feel uncomfortable with his constant advances towards you.
2. He Is Too Nice
If he’s far too nice for your liking and not your type. Or he’s a “nice guy” that constantly makes comparisons between himself and other guys you might be interested in.
It’s a sign you should tell him that you don’t like him because he’s beginning to think he’s already won your heart. Let him know to spare his feelings.
3. He Act’s Like You’re Already Together
When he acts like you’re already his girlfriend, and he goes around telling people about the kiss and what it means. It’s a red flag you need to do something about.
In his mind, you’re a couple already and he’s trying to control the situation. Despite the fact that you don’t actually like him.
It’s time to set the record straight and reveal to him that you’re not his girlfriend because you’re not interested.
4. He Only Has Eyes For You
You know for a fact that other girls have a crush on him, but he’s ignoring them all and only has eyes for you.
When his full focus is on you, and you don’t like him. It’s time to open his eyes and make him realize you’re not the one that’s interested.
5. He Buys You Expensive Gifts
If he buys you expensive gifts out of the blue, and showers you with things you’ve told him that you wanted during a conversation. This could be a sign he’s attempting to buy his way towards your affections.
When he buys you gifts that make you feel guilty, and he’s spending far too much money on you when you hang out. You need to ensure he knows your true feelings, and avoid leading him on.
6. His Expectations Are Unrealistic
Does he hold unrealistic expectations and have high hopes for being in a relationship with you? When he fancies his chances with you far too much, it’s a sign you should bring him back down to earth.
His expectations need to be based on the reality that you don’t actually like him. You’re not interested in a relationship with him, and he needs to know this.
Tips To Tell A Guy You Don’t Like Him Nicely
How do you tell a guy you don’t like him, but in a nice way?
Breaking it to him gently can be tough. But if you use your words and your actions correctly. You can find a way to spare his feelings and stop him from getting hurt.
Here are the tips to tell a guy you don’t like him nicely.
1. Be Gentle
Even though he needs to know the truth about what your feelings really are. It’s important to be gentle with your words and consider his feelings too.
Have a conversation with him about your feelings, but allow him time to process what you are saying. Be gentle and kind.
2. Never Say Mean Things
Don’t be mean to him or say things that are intended to hurt his feelings. You might not be interested in him, but that doesn’t require you to affect his feelings further with your words.
Think about what you say to him before you say it, and avoid doing or saying mean things to him.
3. Give Compliments With Rejection
When you want to tell a guy you don’t like him. Don’t reject him in a way that seems harsh or blunt. This will only serve to hurt his feelings.
Provide your rejection with compliments about the things you think he does do right. If you think he would be a good catch for someone else, let him know why.
4. Tell The Truth Always
Avoid telling lies or masking the truth when you want to let him down nicely. Hiding the truth about your feelings towards him will only make things worse later.
Be upfront about your feelings for him, and tell him exactly why a relationship would not work out between you.
5. Respect His Feelings
Respect his feelings first and foremost. After all, he’s a guy that likes you enough to garner feelings for you. So you need to respectful of this fact.
Pay attention to his feelings as much as you would want someone else to do if you were in his shoes.
Being told someone doesn’t like you back is a tough experience. So make it easier on him by paying mind to his feelings too.
6. Tell Him He Deserves Someone Who Loves Him Back
Make him realize it’s less about you and your feelings towards him, and more about what he has to offer someone else.
He deserves someone who fully willing to care for and love him back. Try to help him switch his focus from you towards someone else who might be interested in him.
FAQ’s
Do Guys Get Attached If You Kiss Them?
When you kiss a guy. It’s normal for him to feel some degree of attachment towards you. He might only want physical intimacy. But he can become emotionally attached to you, especially if he has feelings for you.
How To Avoid Kissing Him When You’re Not Interested?
To avoid kissing a guy you’re not interested in. You should politely reject or refuse the kiss, and put a stop to his advances towards you. Make it clear is not what you want, and that “No, thank you!” is your final answer.
Why Did Kissing Him Change My Mind?
Kissing him changed your mind because you realized he’s not the one. The kiss told you everything you needed to know about your real feelings and the potential of a future relationship with him.
[Read: Why Don’t I Feel Anything When I Kiss Someone?]
A bad first kiss or a kiss that gave you no real feelings is bound to make you question what he really means to you.
How To Deal With Him Taking Rejection Badly?
If you’ve kissed him, but he’s taking your rejection of sharing a relationship with him badly. You need to find space away from him and give him time to come to terms with your true feelings.